A Widow’s Growth and Gratitude

Trauma in our lives teaches us lessons, even ones we don’t want to learn. I do think there is good that comes out of bad. Do we call that God or the universe or our own choices? I’m not sure but we grow and change. We can choose to use that for good and growth. This is different for each of us. I’ve heard some people say that they wonder if their husband would be proud of them now. I do not live my life like that now because I never did in the past. I never had to question whether my husband was proud of me. He gave me his unwavering support during our lives together. He stayed at home with the kids so I could have a career and he loved it. When I was a nervous wreck and this was often, he could calm me down just by being near him or with a couple of words.
He taught me the meaning of self-sacrificing love. I’m also a realist. We fought like all couples and we definitely didn’t agree on most things. We didn’t concentrate on all the ways we were so not a like but found things we enjoyed together. I straight out miss my best friend. I am grateful for our lives together.
Gratitude is a grace we can give ourselves. It’s funny weird to say but there are lots of ways our lives could be worse. Here are some things I am thankful for and you can make your own list.
1. Home
I have a home I love. It’s not fancy or something special but it’s exactly how I want it. Many others do not have a home.

2. Family
Even though we are a family of three now instead of four, we laugh, we hug, we go on for each other. There are many that have never had a family or have lost their entire family.

3. Job
I have a job I love and challenges me in a positive way. Many do hard back breaking work or do not have a job at all.

4. Health
I may not be the picture of health by I am physically and emotionally strong and can work and have fun.

5. Faith
I have a strong family of faith that has held me up when I could not stand. They have continued to love me even when I don’t feel very loveable.

6. My past and my future
Tomorrow is Father’s Day. I have had many Fathers in my life and I am grateful for them all. I have grown so much and so far in a brief time in the past year and four months. I get things done and I love my life. A lot of it is attitude and gratitude and no regrets or “regurts”. Let me know who and what you are thankful for today. Lean into grace and gratitude. Most of all love yourself and love your life.

Free E-mail Challenge

Profile photo

Sign up for Free Surviving Grief Living a Positive Life 10 day Email Video Challenge delivered right to your inbox! Learn how to make positive decisions for new things allowing you to live forward with purpose and presence. You can still live a happy life if you take these steps outlined in this challenge.

We won't send you spam. Unsubscribe at any time. Powered by ConvertKit
Previous Story
Next Story

You Might Also Like

  • Cynthia
    July 15, 2017 at 3:34 pm

    Thank you, I’ve been reading my bible study faithfully and going to church every Sunday . I love going ,the people are very kind it’s a small group and that’s fine . I’m going to the gym 2 or 3 days a week . That really helps my mentally and physically . I don’t have any close friends that live in this state , the only one I did have , and we were like sisters , she just passed away almost a year ago . On July 28 th . Right now I just feel I need to live alone and get back into my new routine. With just me and my 2 dogs 1 inside cat and now my new 5 out side cats . Momma and her kittens . And try to do all the outside chorse as well as the inside . I used to be able to do a lot of it but knw as I’m getting older and have arthritis in my back it seems more overwhelming and I can’t afford to pay someone to help me . But I am trying a litte each week . My son in law, he is the best he has helped a lot . But he dose have his own chorse at there house to do . I have faith that my life will get better and i know change is always a healthy thing . Reading positive information helps me to just keep thinking positive .

    • A Widow's Heart
      August 1, 2017 at 2:11 am

      Keep reading the blog for more tips for positive living. God Bless!

  • Cynthia
    July 6, 2017 at 4:51 pm

    I cant Download anything ,my computer is old and runs very slow . but I’ll still get your emails and I like to read about others that have found hope and what has helped them get passed there loss and the grief that we feel . I have many thoughts to get stuff done like cleaning ,shopping , or visiting family but then when it get later I just don’t want to go anywhere .

    • A Widow's Heart
      July 7, 2017 at 4:08 am

      I am glad to have you as part of our community. We can support each other. I, also, have the hardest time at night. It is so quite and it is often hard to sleep. Don’t feel bad about not wanting to go out at night yet. You’ll know when its right for you.

      • Cynthia
        July 7, 2017 at 1:51 pm

        Thanks , I never thought that I would feel like this . I dident feel like this when my mother passed 12 years ago but I was able to stay with her in the hospital all day and night . I talked with her and groomed her hands and feet . But she was on life support and she was the best mother ever , I really never grieved mush till later and the same for my father her passed 2 year’s ago I’m the only daughter out of 4 that felt I had to stay with them till they pass . I know this was my closure with them , but for my husband I was not home his daughter was with him , but I rushed home and cryed , talked , and layed on the floor for 3 hours with him just wounded what and why this happened . He was not in really bad health . But recently , I’ve found out some terrible things that his daughter and him were doing , drug’s, yes and his daughter even stayed with me for weeks 0 after he passed . So now I am so upset that she played a part in the death of her father . I just can’t believe she did this after knowing how hard I was trying to get him to feeling better mentally and physically . And he was doing good . So should I confront her and let his family know all this . My kids all know but lve raised my kids to be respectable, careing and his girls have showed me no caring or even tryed to comfort me or came so I could comfort them . But they have always been selfish and they have never been careing or respectable for anyone but themselves . I tryed to show them how family’s should be careing and kind . I see that never worked . But he’s sister really never got to know his girls they only new what he had told them and he never told them how bad they all were . So now his sister that I got him to finally talk to for the last 15 years and I’ve talked to her as well is not talking to me now recently but has been talking to the only one daughter that was at my house with her father . . And I have his ashes and they are not talking to me at this moment . So this really hurts me . So I don’t know what to do about all this .

        • A Widow's Heart
          July 9, 2017 at 10:17 pm

          I’ve been thinking about your post. I’m sorry about such divisions in your family. Usually these are just magnified after loss. You need to take care of yourself and find a close friend or therapist to talk to more about the details of your situation. You are only responsible for you at this time. If you look to others for comfort, it puts your well being in others hands instead of your own. You can’t control how others act or react to loss, only how you respond. Nourish yourself now. I hope things work out well with time.